Today I feel like writing about Amanda Palmer. I just read that her mentor is dying and she cancelled everything she was doing in the UK to fly back to him to say her last goodbye. While reading her post I couldn't help but cry. And it made me wonder. How come I'm crying for the pain of someone I barely know. I'll probably never meet her and she doesn't even know I exist. Don't worry, this is not some "I'm in love with a rockstar" kinda thing.
My first encounter with Amanda Palmer's music was at the very beginning of this year. A very dear friend of mine I hadn't seen in ages decided to spend New Year's Holiday at our house. She's travelled the world and basically knows Youtube by heart ;) On a funny evening, we were just there chatting, chilling and drinking beers and she talked about Amanda Palmer. Of course I knew her by name but I didn't know any of her songs. My friend was absolutely excited to show us the clip for her song "Do it with a rockstar" which also features the great Stoya (whom I hadn't heard of before).
So we watched the video. And I completely identified to her. If you haven't seen it, I strongly advise you to stop reading and just go : http://bit.ly/1MQWq1M
In this video she plays the role of herself, playing a gig in a club while Stoya is hitting on her. They end up in bed and she has some kind of nervous break down. All I could think of was that : "Waouh I'm not the only one !!!???" Because I could really picture myself having a nervous breakdown in bed with Stoya ;) I was truly amazed by her sensitivity. This "I don't give a fish about what you think of me, I am who I am, take it or leave it". This is something in life that I want to be able to master. I'm not saying I want to stop shaving my armpits or draw eyebrows on my face (though I find it absolutely awesome). Just being myself without caring if people like it or not.
After that first encounter, life went on. I started looking for things about her (this doesn't sound like a stalker at all) and discovered she is married to author Neil Gaiman. I adore Neil Gaiman's books. Amanda won more points in my heart.
I discovered the "bed song" one day : http://bit.ly/1trLIoz
There's no word to describe what I felt at that moment. Maybe finally discovering the Truth. This is an amazing piece of art that resonnated in my mind. The melody struck me right in the heart and it has become one of my favorite songs.
I also discovered her work with the Dresden Dolls which is fabulous.
Then I followed her on Twitter (now that is stalking ^^). I think this woman is a piece of art by herself.
Anyway when I read her terrible news this morning, I felt entitled to share my feelings.
I guess we'll never really know how these feelings work. I don't mind. I have my own personal role model to look up to.